so messed up

so messed up
so confused
so screwed up
like i'm abused

what is this
why is that
need some answers
but i can't get

stuck at home
feel alone
watching others
while i stone

crazy things
in this world
none as crazy
as that girl

enlistement
2 days away
when i'm in
would i turn gay?

all the anger
all the hate
diminishes
with each date

it'll take some time
for me to heal
i'll try to figure
what is real

learn to forgive
and forget
let it go
and don't regret

holding on
to my belief
hope it'll bring me
some relief

there is one
meant for you
when she comes
you'll get the cue

God's with me
all along
even when i sang
those hateful songs

all my thoughts
in this rhyme
will it be remembered
till next time?